1800Flowers Encourages Donating Blood

Everyone knows that donating blood is a pyramid scheme perpetrated by vampires, and 1800Flowers supports romance through their sale of flowers, therefore 1800Flowers supports the pyramid scheme otherwise known as donating blood (for the record I have no proof it's a pyramid scheme, only deep suspicions...)

So if you are wondering about the connection; 1800Flowers has a Twilight flowers DVD offer. Vampires, flowers, they're all in on it together. This is good news for girls who love Flowers and Twilight. Recently 1800Flowers was even featured on MSNBC for having awesome deals on flowers compared to other companies. So buy your girl flowers, and donate blood while you're at it - MUHAHAHAHA!

Why Women Love Flowers

Flowers of course are the pretty things we buy our moms on Mother's Day, and our girlfriends or wives or both on Valentine's Day.

The other definition is the reproductive structure found within a plant. You see, "The biological function of a flower is to mediate the union of male sperm with female ovum in order to produce seeds. The process begins with pollination, is followed by fertilization, leading to the formation and dispersal of the seeds." - Wikipedia

Basically it's plant sex. So am I saying that girls like flowers because they are preoccupied by sex? I don't know, but what I do know is that sex is one thing you will not be preoccupied with if you don't get your girl some flowers on February 13th. Just a heads up, you can thank me later.